sillylittlepet
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WELP turns out there were a ton of new posts and I'm late to the game
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The random chat/off topic thread
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Death
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You're completely right. And I already told my ex in the early morning, my time, that it's my fault that it ended up this way. She disagreed, but I know I am right. :/ This is going to haunt me... how am I supposed to get past that I pushed her away? This is unbelievably terrible. :/
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Ceilidh
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Death, I completely agree with Seb and Silly.
The only thing I would add is taking up a hobby to help take your mind off of things, or to focus energy into. As I told Seb, what got me through my past hardships were a combination of many things. I read close to 30 books in a few months time; I would read anything and everything as long as it put my mind in another world. Even just for a little while. I also went back to my artistic background and started drawing and painting again.
This time around I am taking up knitting. I'm attempting to make a shawl. But I would love to make a shrug or two and a pretty sweater dress for myself. But we'll see how the shawl turns out.
My point is. Just find something that slightly interests you and try it. Want to go rock climbing? Learn everything there is to know and do it. Want a awesome swearer? Learn to knit. Want to redecorate your home? Take up painting on canvas....the sky is your limit.
The only thing I would add is taking up a hobby to help take your mind off of things, or to focus energy into. As I told Seb, what got me through my past hardships were a combination of many things. I read close to 30 books in a few months time; I would read anything and everything as long as it put my mind in another world. Even just for a little while. I also went back to my artistic background and started drawing and painting again.
This time around I am taking up knitting. I'm attempting to make a shawl. But I would love to make a shrug or two and a pretty sweater dress for myself. But we'll see how the shawl turns out.
My point is. Just find something that slightly interests you and try it. Want to go rock climbing? Learn everything there is to know and do it. Want a awesome swearer? Learn to knit. Want to redecorate your home? Take up painting on canvas....the sky is your limit.
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sebastian
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Death, no relationship ever dies purely because of one partner. Your gf had a choice to make. She chose to cheat on you and lie to you. That is not your fault. You did not make her do those things. Yes, you may have contributed to her doing that by pushing her away, but it didn't mean she had to cheat on you. The mature, responsible thing would have been for her to break up with you first. Even in a d/s relationship, the dom doesn't have truly complete control. The only thing you will ever have truly complete control over sexually is your own hand (or a sex doll, but ever those break).
How do you get over your role in what happened? You figure out what you did to contribute to the problem, you work to stop doing whatever you did wrong, and you take that knowledge into your next relationship and try your damnedest not to make the same mistake.
How do you get over your role in what happened? You figure out what you did to contribute to the problem, you work to stop doing whatever you did wrong, and you take that knowledge into your next relationship and try your damnedest not to make the same mistake.
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Death
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Thinking it over after I wrote my last post, I just can't take responsibility for her actions. Honestly, overall, I did my best... I definitely can't say I pushed her away. At worst, I was maybe a bit *too* cheerful... so really, not my fault. However, otherwise, I suppose I do need to keep my negativity in check, more, as it could have the potential to cause misunderstandings for a girl that well could be perfect for me.
I'm going to move on... in time, I will find the girl for me. I have plenty of time, still; I may be 29 and a half by now, but despite all the unhealthy candy I eat, I'm aging really well, and in regards to my shallowness, that's all that matters, really.
I have to be going to bed, now... thanks for the chat, all. Hmm, and thanks for the flattering, too, sillylittlepet.
And I do put the bar pretty high, as you said, yes... compromise isn't my strongest quality.
I'm going to think about something to get my mind off all this, tomorrow.
I'm going to move on... in time, I will find the girl for me. I have plenty of time, still; I may be 29 and a half by now, but despite all the unhealthy candy I eat, I'm aging really well, and in regards to my shallowness, that's all that matters, really.
I have to be going to bed, now... thanks for the chat, all. Hmm, and thanks for the flattering, too, sillylittlepet.
And I do put the bar pretty high, as you said, yes... compromise isn't my strongest quality.I'm going to think about something to get my mind off all this, tomorrow.
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Death
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I had a pretty good day, today. ^_^ First I had a time with my hairdresser, who I talked quite a bit with about recent events; I know her pretty well and I have a tendency to like to talk quite a bit, at times, and at present time it did me especially good. Afterwards, I went shopping the rest of the day, which was fun. Yes, I'm a man who likes shopping. 
I'm glad I never got any new bedclothes while together with her, as my memory is almost overwhelming, at times, so had I done that, I would always remember how I felt when I bought them. As such, now I had the chance to get new ones with my future true love in mind, that I'm sure it's only a matter of time until I meet. Then I went to another store and bought a dark purple bathrobe - my favourite colour after light pink (and black, of course, that I generally prefer to wear), although a light pink bathrobe would kind of suit better on my future girlfriend, rather than on me. Only the dark purple colour was on sale, too - I guess my favourite colour isn't very popular. Then I went to yet another store that I always love to go to and, among some other things, bought some very cute dessert spoons with a heart on top in a simplistic design. I've always loved cute things... hmm. Can be perceived a bit peculiar, I'd think, considering my very morbid mind... after that, I went to a café to have a cup of coffee and a piece of sacher cake. At the end of the day I also bought an Australian white wine that seemed kind of tasty, intended to be saved for a future, very happy occasion. I don't drink much alcohol so saving it for that fine day will be easy. Overall, I felt very optimistic all day and there is no way that I'm going to let what happened bring my mood down. Next time I will surely find the girl that actually is *mine*; the girl who actually loves me and whose only wish is to be together with me, happy and taken care of, as my precious slave and innocent little girl.
I've been thinking of something fun that I will start doing, now, to get out of just being by myself, all the time... that's just not healthy for my mind. Years ago, already, I wanted to start snowboarding. Well, the winter is soon here, now, and I don't live too far from the places where you can do it, so this winter is the time when I will start with it. I'm looking forward to it already.
I'm glad I never got any new bedclothes while together with her, as my memory is almost overwhelming, at times, so had I done that, I would always remember how I felt when I bought them. As such, now I had the chance to get new ones with my future true love in mind, that I'm sure it's only a matter of time until I meet. Then I went to another store and bought a dark purple bathrobe - my favourite colour after light pink (and black, of course, that I generally prefer to wear), although a light pink bathrobe would kind of suit better on my future girlfriend, rather than on me. Only the dark purple colour was on sale, too - I guess my favourite colour isn't very popular. Then I went to yet another store that I always love to go to and, among some other things, bought some very cute dessert spoons with a heart on top in a simplistic design. I've always loved cute things... hmm. Can be perceived a bit peculiar, I'd think, considering my very morbid mind... after that, I went to a café to have a cup of coffee and a piece of sacher cake. At the end of the day I also bought an Australian white wine that seemed kind of tasty, intended to be saved for a future, very happy occasion. I don't drink much alcohol so saving it for that fine day will be easy. Overall, I felt very optimistic all day and there is no way that I'm going to let what happened bring my mood down. Next time I will surely find the girl that actually is *mine*; the girl who actually loves me and whose only wish is to be together with me, happy and taken care of, as my precious slave and innocent little girl.I've been thinking of something fun that I will start doing, now, to get out of just being by myself, all the time... that's just not healthy for my mind. Years ago, already, I wanted to start snowboarding. Well, the winter is soon here, now, and I don't live too far from the places where you can do it, so this winter is the time when I will start with it. I'm looking forward to it already.
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Ceilidh
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Oh Death! It sounds like you had a great day. I'm so happy to hear you are doing better. I do have to say that there is something about getting your hair done and a day of shopping that is relaxing. Or just taking the day and making it about you.
You, my friend, are going to love snowboarding. I'm so jealous. My hubby was supost to take me snowboarding before we left Japan, but he didn't. He did however get to snowboard Mt. Fuji without me.
jerk.
Do you have a Wii? If you do the Shaun White snowboard game on the balance board is a lot like the real thing. My hubby and friend said it helped them improve their snowboarding.
And I'll end this post with a thought/quote that popped into my head this morning after I woke up and was trying to sort my feelings out - which I'm still trying to figure out.
"The pain reminds me I am still alive. When the pain gets to be too much to bear is when I don't want to be here anymore."
You, my friend, are going to love snowboarding. I'm so jealous. My hubby was supost to take me snowboarding before we left Japan, but he didn't. He did however get to snowboard Mt. Fuji without me.
jerk. Do you have a Wii? If you do the Shaun White snowboard game on the balance board is a lot like the real thing. My hubby and friend said it helped them improve their snowboarding.
And I'll end this post with a thought/quote that popped into my head this morning after I woke up and was trying to sort my feelings out - which I'm still trying to figure out.
"The pain reminds me I am still alive. When the pain gets to be too much to bear is when I don't want to be here anymore."
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sebastian
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Death, I'm glad to hear you had a better day today. Doing that sort of mundane stuff can be very good when you're down. I'm all for a little retail therapy, when I can afford it.
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sillylittlepet
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hoorrraaaayyyy for a good day =D
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Death
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Thank you. Yes, it was a pretty good day. Can't go shopping every day, though. :B Although if I actually did, it'd quickly get boring, of course...
I do have a Wii. Not a balance board, though... that sounds interesting, though; I probably should get it...
Yes, it was a pretty good day. Can't go shopping every day, though. :B Although if I actually did, it'd quickly get boring, of course...I do have a Wii. Not a balance board, though... that sounds interesting, though; I probably should get it...
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