The random chat/off topic thread

[Tumbl3]

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That actions speak louder than words. I learned that I'm codependent and dating someone else who is also codependent makes for a huge mess. Also learned that I am not a dominant. I like to be submissive and I love to dress up.

You're right it wasn't too ugly a break up but it hurt like hell. They always do. I really loved him and I did everything I could for him but in the end it wasn't enough.

I'm better off without him though. All he did was drag me down. If anyone loves you they'll always do their best to lift you up; friend, lover, or family.

 

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[sebastian]

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Those are all important things to learn. Sadly, too many of the important lessons are only learned through experience rather than books. Hope you feel better soon.

 

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[sebastian]

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I just want express gratitude to anyone on this forum who has served in the Armed Forces and helped secure the many freedoms for BDSMers should be especially thankful.

 

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[Moonlight]

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My husband was at work and was pulled into the manager's office. The store manager, ops manager and his zone manager were all there. He was thinking oh shit when when they told him to close the door and to have a seat. Turns out his good friend and co worker was found dead next to his pickup. He had a massive heart attack. They gave him the option to go home but he decided to tough it out at work.

 

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[Tumbl3]

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Seb: Thank you. I am already feeling much better (as our break up was back in February) and I've reconnected with a friend who I am interested in dating.
Moonlight: Omg I am so sorry to hear that. And kudos to him, that takes a lot of balls.

 

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[Moonlight]

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Sorry to hear about your break up. One of my friends just left her husband. She is not as upset about leaving as she is he promised to be a father to her children. Now he wont even speak to them. They are pretty young children, they don't understand why the man they call daddy suddenly acts like he hates them. So she is very hurt for her kids.


He has balls all right. The only time he ever came home sick was when he got food poisoning. He is the manager of the electrical dept of a home improvement store so he figured the costumers would not appreciate him getting sick on them.

He got home and looked so weighed down. I wasn't sure if I should leave him alone and let him process or offer affection. I ended up doing both by the end of the evening. He held on so tight, I could tell he was really hurting.

 

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[sebastian]

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Moonlight: That's terrible. Make sure he gets the opportunity to talk about what he's feeling. Lots of guys stuff all that pain away, and eventually it worms its way out, often in unhealthy ways like drinking. Is there a grief counselor he can see?

 

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[sebastian]

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I would just like to take the time to thank Smallest for the enormous amount of work she does clearing out all the spam that the forum has been getting lately. It's a lot worse than it used to be, and she manages to get it all. So let's offer her a round of applause and gratitude (unless she's into ridicule, in which case let's all call her a worthless bitch).

 

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[Moonlight]

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I am not sure he would see a grief counselor. He is one to stuff what he is feeling. Sometimes he talks to me but if he thinks it would upset me or make me worry he wont. I will see if he will talk about it. If not he may open up to another friend he already had plans with for tomorrow. He will talk to him about things he wont any of his other friends simply because this friend gets him if that makes any sense. Those two really think alike.

They may provide someone at work, I am not sure. There are a lot of his co workers posting on his facebook page that they are sorry and know this is hurting him a lot more since he was really good friends even outside of work.

 

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[sebastian]

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The refusal to discuss painful emotions is one of the biggest disasters in American masculinity. It leads to all sorts of destructive behaviors, poor health, failed relationships, and other problems.

You're submissive, but I don't know if your husband is your dom or not. If he is, perhaps one way to approach it is to remind him that BDSM is about being open and available. A dom needs to be open about his feelings, in order to receive the sub's feelings and needs.

 

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