The random chat/off topic thread

[Death]

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I know your post was for Death, but I'm in the middle of a breakup right now too and words like that are comforting : )
At least for me

Hmm, "too".... I'm not in the middle of a breakup. -_-; I love her much more than I did before, now, and I'm sure she isn't having it easy, either. Just had to point that out.... -_-

life is more than just our relationships

I disagree completely..... all I've done for ten years is wait for the right girl. The rest of life is pretty much totally pointless; only finding true love holds a true lasting value; it even follows in death. Just gets better in death, really, as "death" breaks the boundaries of life, making it possible for the couple to enjoy their lives so much better. That's why I chose the forum name Death, here, as it can be so positive to me. I know, crazy talk. I don't openly express these "beliefs" to many people, that's for sure. Anyway, thanks for your kind words, before, but I just couldn't stop loving her. I know that others say this too, yet their feelings change, with time, but I'm kind of different in quite a few ways.... easy to say, but I've had it proven in pretty clear ways since I was a child, already. Anyway, today passed a bit easier, at least.... was in denial about it most of the day. Of course, checking my e-mail, again, woke me up from it. -_-

On an unrelated note... has anyone talked with Amuk, recently? He PM'ed me after I took a break from the forum and I didn't end up returning here to answer his PM until a few days ago.

 

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[sillylittlepet]

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sorry death! I guess I meant that I was having hardships related to a relationship, in which I'm no longer seeing my partner whom I still very much love

I'm not really sure if I agree or disagree yet with seb! I haven't had that many relationships but I haven't spent that much time single yet either. Eventually I want to find someone who I can live the rest of my life with and share important experiences, but if I never found that person I don't want to feel like a failure either. In the end I just want to enjoy life

Amuk hasnt really posted in a while =(

 

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[sebastian]

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Don't get me wrong; romantic relationships are a major part of life. They bring a very deep kind of meaning to our existence, a kind of meaning that I crave and always have. I would not want to live a life devoid of romantic partnership, and I am frustrated by my current lack of one. But romantic relationships are not the only sort of meaningful relationship one can have. Although I'm not a parent, I realize that parenting relationships can been intensely satisfying, moreso than romantic ones (just ask my mother about that). Deep friendships can be extremely satisfying. Some people found profound meaning in their relationship with God. For some work activities, political or social causes or artistic activities are deeply satisfying. So there are a whole range of things that can give our lives meaning.

I think the best life strategy is to build a life based on as many of these things as possible. Because if you put all your eggs in one basket, when you lose that basket, there's nothing left. Romantic relationships can be extremely fragile things, and it can take years to meet a fully-compatible partner, who may not remain fully-compatible as he or she ages with you. All sorts of things can end such a relationship.

Death, although you clearly have a very deep capacity for romantic attachment, that's not all you are. You are capable of being more than simply a romantic partner, and you have value as something other than a romantic partner. Believe me, I have very much the same instincts in those areas that you do. I have enormous capacity to focus on my partner's needs. When I don't have a partner, I have great difficulty focusing that energy on my own needs, and that energy often goes to making me a little bit crazy, in the form of anxiety or depression. But one of the things that enabled me to survive my husband leaving was focusing on my career instead. I essentially wrote a book while I was pulling out of my depression because it was one of the things I could sink energy into that had some meaning and value for me. So stop thinking of yourself as simply half of a relationship. You are a full person even when you're not partnered. Let the other parts of yourself live and breathe.

But believe me, I understand. Two months after my husband left, I was exactly where you are, and I couldn't hear it when friends and family told me what I'm telling you.

 

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[Death]

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I didn't post about it, before, but I have now heard from her and she is okay. ^_^ What had happened was just about what I had been thinking it was.

 

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[sillylittlepet]

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-spits out her drink-

she was actually raped by stalkers because of her skimpy ballet uniform and was so ashamed that she tried to kill herself?!?!?!

DUDE. WHAT. THE. FUCK

I guess I owe you an apology death! I though you were nuts, but you were right! D:

 

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[Death]

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Um, no. :/ I meant that she merely had been hospitalized. Therefore the smiley face, as it wasn't something severe... and I did say she was okay.

You thought I was nuts? Sorry to hear that. :l I was just worried... that's how I look at it.

 

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[sillylittlepet]

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(i was kidding about the nuts part)
(I guess jokes dont really translate well over the internet... =/)

I'm glad she re-connected with you though! It must feel good

 

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[sebastian]

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I'm glad she got back in touch with you. I really understand what it's like, wishing someone would break radio silence and tell you what's happened. I envy you that.

 

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[L8NightQ]

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She's ok, and you're ok (now)

Glad to hear it.

 

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[sillylittlepet]

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I've been thinking about goals and dreams lately

what are you (the forumers) dreams/goals? Or things you've always wanted to do/try
I've got an infatuation with modeling, I would loooove to try modeling some day! (some how...)

 

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