new and need punishment suggestions

[phillyskin]

yes, we've discussed the possibility of an emotional tie forming. There's definitely an emotional involvement there already, (I'm actually quite a romantic, which makes this whole thing slightly weird for me). However we've decided that as long we're both aware of that possibility and make the decision to end this portion of our relationship if we feel that that's happening.

Involving Betty is out of the question, Not only do I not desire that, but Anne wants to make sure that the two relationships stay separate.

What she's going to think of this whole thing is going to be quite interesting, since she's aware of the previous relationship. Plus she doesn't know me from adam, to her I'm just a random guy from the internet.

I'd be happy to continue discussing this with everyone here, it's seems like the right place for now. Plus spending some time reading has given me a bunch of ideas for playing with Anne. It's really interesting seeing how her attitude towards me has changed in just the past week.

 

[sebastian]

(I'm actually quite a romantic, which makes this whole thing slightly weird for me)

There's a lot of room for romance in bdsm. What is more romantic than giving yourself entirely to the person you love? And for many doms, part of the deal is taking care of and protecting their sub, even if that means that being the only who gets to hurt the sub.

 

[phillyskin]

Not quite what I meant. It's actually almost two separate comments. The love I have for her (not the same as it was, of course) is the romantic bit. Just the way I was raised hitting a woman is a concept that still makes me slightly uncomfortable (quite difficult to describe the sensation, almost like something distant buzzing in your ear), even though I know it's for pleasure, which is the other half.

Your comment about taking care of and protecting the sub hit home for me. Partly cause part of her fantasy as a sub is to be a princess, partly because the romantic notion of protecting her appeals to me.

 

[phillyskin]

Well, small update. Anne i guess came to her senses or whatever and has decided not to go through with it. So, who's available? Just kidding. Thanks for all your advice and help, I may stop in from time to time, and if i find myself in a relationship with a new sub I'll be sure and come back.

 

[Nuka]

It may be disappointing but it will be easier in the long run tbh.

And please do stick around, you never know what may happen

 

[L8NightQ]

I have a feeling this isn't as over as you think.

Thank you PS for sharing with is.

 

[phillyskin]

Yes, it most likely will be easier NukAshlie.

L8NightQ, I tend to agree with you. Since this whole thing has started I've just been keeping my mind (and my eyes) open. So we'll see what progresses in the coming days. I do know that if anything further happens it will be her doing, I'm too much a gentleman to push, since she's in an apparently happy relationship.

No problem, no reason not to share, and hopefully I've found some new people to talk to on occasion.

 

[phillyskin]

so apparently it is not, in fact, over entirely. The online bit will be continuing for the time being. I still want to get her in bed, but that doesn't look like it will be happening at this point in time.

I'd like to push in that direction at some point but I'm not really sure of how to pursue that. Especially since I don't want her to feel forced into it. Of course, I also don't want to hurt her relationship, so I guess I'll continue to just play along and if it comes up again it comes up.

 

[sillylittlepet]

why do you want to get her in bed instead of, say, someone new who isnt your ex who you can experiment and play with without baggage and a separate partner?

I guess I just dont see why you insist on punishing yourself with this relationship which is potentially unstable to begin with (with her being your ex AND her already having a partner who may or may not be okay with you playing with her. I was never really clear on that)

EDIT: oh I see, "betty" did agree to it, my bad
It still doesnt seem like the greatest idea to play with your ex when you could just start a new relationship

 

[phillyskin]

Several reasons. For one thing while a relationship with an ex is normally something I'd avoid like the plague the situation is different in that we never actually broke up, we simply lost contact for an extended period of time as the relationship was a long distance one.

Two, because I'm seriously attracted to the girl and I'm sure it would be a hell of a lot fun.

Three, because I'm socially retarded and I just got out an eight year relationship, in addition to never having actually dated in the normal sense of the word. I really have little to no idea on how to pick up a girl. Plus there's no girls available in either the circle of people I'm friends with (as in girls my friends know) or in anyway related to my work or it's location.

Also I don't know that it's punishment exactly, I'm not expecting or even really wanting any kind of romantic relationship with her.