Is it too much

Boundperil · Jun 14, 2010

Welcome to the forum.

I have agreement that it is time off when my sub has her period, but that is just me. I think that time is important to refresh ones body and soul, then again, we don't live a true 24/7 life, though it does leak into every aspect of our lives.

As others have said, you need to talk this out. I find it very immature as a Dom to act that way.

sebastian · Jun 14, 2010

It seems to me that Isabellla's Dom is primarily at fault here. Let's review the evidence:
1) She's new to being a submissive and he's already taken her a fair distance toward TPE. That seems awfully fast to me. If she's this new, I would think a prudent dom would be going somewhat slower, making sure that she has the understanding and the tools to do what's expected of her. (It's possible that she is progressing very quickly and he thinks she's completely ready, but that's not the sense I get here from her overall post)
2) He gave her a very broad command without making it clear to her exactly what that command entailed. Sparrow's right that he has the right to do it and she could have found a way around it, but it seems to me that he should have given her more guidance. Remember, she's new to this, not an experienced sub.
3) He punished her in anger, which is generally supposed to be a no-no, and then gave her the silent treatment, AND forbad her to speak. (Read her post closely--she refers to punishment and then to his being silent) Given the importance of regularly communication, he is not only refusing to communicate with her, he is forbidding her to speak to him (although presumably she could write a note). So instead of punishing her and letting that be the end of it, he is nursing a grudge in a way that makes a real resolution of the problem more difficult.
All of this makes me think he is either inexperienced as a dom or that he has unrealistic expectations of her given her newness. Either way, I think she needs to insist on a serious conversation about what's going on, why he's pushing her so far so fast, and why he thought that cutting off communication was appropriate. Now if she were an experienced sub, his actions would be much more reasonable.

Darktruth · Jun 14, 2010

Sparrow69 said:
id like to point out, darktruth, that as i said, while sanitary care is a necessity, tampons are not. Eating is a necessity that cannot be subjugated, and therefore, is moot, however he could prohibit her from using utensils... As for the cotton swab for the ears, not everyone doesn't that, and it is by far NOT necessary to do.

My point wasn’t eating nor the cotton buds, they were merely examples of inserting something into your body. Without specifying what the rules were they count therefore my point isn’t moot at all. While the eating example is clearly an extreme example my point was to show the vagueness of this rule. I have no problems with the rule at all but I do with the vagueness of it. Isabella needed to clarify what this covers before she agreed to it but her Master should have as well. I don’t get the feeling this was deliberately vague in order to teach her a lesson either because, if it was, then her Master wouldn’t be giving her the Silent Treatment; he would have spoken to her after her punishment and told her why it was so vague and that next time she should fully understand what she’s agreeing to before she agrees to it.

Seb – Good post. I was going to point out the fact that their relationship seems to be moving a little too fast but I had a hangover and I needed to go out so I didn’t have time. Lol. I knew somebody would pick up on it though.

As you said though, maybe she's a quick learner so far be it from me to comment on that.

Martello · Jun 14, 2010

Admittedly I didn't read over everyone else's posts as well as I usually do. From what I read from the first poster, I was just aggravated to the point where I wanted to get to the bottom of the screen.

I don't believe any personal habits involving health and hygiene should be dictated by a Dom at all. Regardless of BDSM, I personally think him holding you down and forcibly removing it is wrong. I'm sorry I don't like it at all.

Is it too much

Boundperil

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sebastian

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Darktruth

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Martello

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