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Hello everyone. This is my first post. I have read the FAQ and rules. After my last relationship ended, I began to look into starting a relationship as a Dom. My ex and I had dabbled in various aspects of BDSM such as Bondage, spanking, humiliation, etc. I loved every second of it, but it's not something we did very often. Going into my new relationship, I am being honest with myself about what I want.
I met someone on Alt.com that I met up with, and got to know a little bit. I slept with her the first night we met, because we had an amazing chemistry. Everything was awesome. She told me about another man that she had met before me, but she wasn't going to see him again. So far we have been seeing each other for a month. I have been trying to gauge what she wants, and been talking to her. My understanding was that she had little experience in this, and was looking to experiment. With that in mind I have been taking things slowly sexually, and trying to build trust. Everything we have done so far has been pretty vanilla. Just rough sex, some choking, light spanking, etc.
Well, the other night she revealed to me, out of guilt, that she had met a Dom shortly before she met me. This person apparently has experience, and is older also. I am only 27, and the woman I am seeing is 42. She said that this didn't bother her, and I am really into it myself. Anyway, I was a little hurt that she hid it from me. Apparently when they meet, it's pretty intense. When I saw her she had some pretty heavy bruises, etc. She told me that she likes me way more than she realized she would. Her Dom asked her not to see me, but she told him that she would follow his rules, with me as an exception. He apparently has come to terms with this.
She knows that I want to explore this type of relationship with her, but I don't know how I feel about it if she is seeing this other Dom. I am definitely inexperienced, but we have already built a really deep connection with each other, and I don't want to stop seeing her. I have no right to ask her to stop seeing him. I want to develop this relationship with her further in hopes of her eventually dropping the other guy, and being with me exclusively. I wan this to happen naturally, and by her own choice. I want her to submit to me fully, willingly.
My ultimate question is how should I approach this situation? From what I understand, they have only met a few times. Am I out of my league here? She told me that he is older than her, and he has an almost fatherly role in their sessions. But it is obvious that she is more attached to me emotionally.
I have no ego, but I know I could do this if she gives me the chance. Am I wrong for wanting to take her from him? I have concerns because I don't know who he is, and I want her to be safe. I guess I can be honest and say I'm also jealous. Any help would be appreciated, and just let me know if you need more info, or have any questions.
TL;DR Met a woman, want to be her Dom, found out she met someone just before me that is a Dom. She told me she doesn't think she can stop seeing him because she "needs it". She told him she won't stop seeing me. How do I show her that I can give her everything she needs, and be her Dom without being demanding? Want this to happen naturally. Thanks!
I met someone on Alt.com that I met up with, and got to know a little bit. I slept with her the first night we met, because we had an amazing chemistry. Everything was awesome. She told me about another man that she had met before me, but she wasn't going to see him again. So far we have been seeing each other for a month. I have been trying to gauge what she wants, and been talking to her. My understanding was that she had little experience in this, and was looking to experiment. With that in mind I have been taking things slowly sexually, and trying to build trust. Everything we have done so far has been pretty vanilla. Just rough sex, some choking, light spanking, etc.
Well, the other night she revealed to me, out of guilt, that she had met a Dom shortly before she met me. This person apparently has experience, and is older also. I am only 27, and the woman I am seeing is 42. She said that this didn't bother her, and I am really into it myself. Anyway, I was a little hurt that she hid it from me. Apparently when they meet, it's pretty intense. When I saw her she had some pretty heavy bruises, etc. She told me that she likes me way more than she realized she would. Her Dom asked her not to see me, but she told him that she would follow his rules, with me as an exception. He apparently has come to terms with this.
She knows that I want to explore this type of relationship with her, but I don't know how I feel about it if she is seeing this other Dom. I am definitely inexperienced, but we have already built a really deep connection with each other, and I don't want to stop seeing her. I have no right to ask her to stop seeing him. I want to develop this relationship with her further in hopes of her eventually dropping the other guy, and being with me exclusively. I wan this to happen naturally, and by her own choice. I want her to submit to me fully, willingly.
My ultimate question is how should I approach this situation? From what I understand, they have only met a few times. Am I out of my league here? She told me that he is older than her, and he has an almost fatherly role in their sessions. But it is obvious that she is more attached to me emotionally.
I have no ego, but I know I could do this if she gives me the chance. Am I wrong for wanting to take her from him? I have concerns because I don't know who he is, and I want her to be safe. I guess I can be honest and say I'm also jealous. Any help would be appreciated, and just let me know if you need more info, or have any questions.
TL;DR Met a woman, want to be her Dom, found out she met someone just before me that is a Dom. She told me she doesn't think she can stop seeing him because she "needs it". She told him she won't stop seeing me. How do I show her that I can give her everything she needs, and be her Dom without being demanding? Want this to happen naturally. Thanks!
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